It’s the most wonderful time of the year.


Oh Summer 16′. You’ve brought us the dirtiest Olympics, literally and figuratively: the millennial nostalgia of Pokemon Go and the Endless return of Frank Ocean.

But now that summer is over, we are on the brink of cuffing season. Now if this isn’t your first rodeo, you know that you need to step up your game if you want to make it to playoffs. The trick is to start exploring your options now to make sure you don’t end spending your holidays alone stuffing your face with leftover pies and bing-watching Rob & Chyna. Lets face it, there is only so much Tinder can do for you boo.

Ten years ago we were sitting behind a computer logging onto chat platforms to talk to our friends. Today we scroll through our Facebook timeline and have full on conversations on Whats App while catching up with a friend over a cup of coffee who is telling you how her recent breakup has turned her into a Yogi. Talk about multitasking, because apparently this isn’t rude but innovative. So seeing as everyone has a closer relationship with their phones nowadays; having a conversation with someone you’re trying to get to know has become quite a challenge. So what is the fastest and easiest way to get to know someone? Ask them the most personal question: “What’s on your Continue Watching List on Netflix?”.

If you don’t want to end up having a very awkward “morning after”, binge -watching Bo jack Horseman while having a beer for breakfast, don’t consider checking if you’re compatible by comparing your Netflix feed to see if you are on the same level/page/book to what the true meaning of life is.

So here is a top 10 of the most watched shows on Netflix and what they tell you about your new love interest

Game Of Thrones
Enjoys mindfucks, role play and long walks to the fridge. Pays attention to details and is very prepared for this winter, which means a cuddling master has entered your life. Has an above average attention span and will remember every single thing you tell them. So great conversationalist! Keep in mind that you may have a Hipster on your hands, if so don’t run away, you should deal with this in an honorable way. Ghost them ’till they get the message and leave you alone.

Ideal Date night – A night of movie- and food binging on the couch.

Knows the ingredients to swag and isn’t ashamed to mix it up with a dash of ratchet. Is either a great dancer or has good taste in music and enjoys doing activities out of the house. Beware of this person playing you though, your lover may be seeing other people or plotting something twisted. Tough Cookie.

Ideal Date night – Twerking at a club or a Strip club.

Orange Is The New Black
You are dating an emotional wreck with a perverted mind. The upside of having an over dramatic lover is the great and passionate sex though, so if you can deal with some drama you are in for a wild ride.

Ideal Date Night – Open Mic night at a dingy bar.

American Horror Story
You’re dating someone who loves suspense and needs excitement on a daily basis. So watch out if your situationship gets a bit too boring, or else you’ll end up warming up to your pillow for the rest of the holidays.
Ideal Date Night – Rollercoaster rides at a theme park.
You’re either dating a Boss Lady or a man who admires a woman in charge. This person is not to be played with, you have a living polygraph on your hands so don’t even think about telling a white lie because you will get caught. Plus side, you caught a loyal lover who will be devoted to you. Just make sure you change all your passwords once in a while…just in case.
Ideal Date Night – Quality time over multiple glasses of Shiraz. Skip dinner and go straight for some rough sex for dessert.
The Walking Dead
BINGO! You have found a lover who’s loyal and will stick with you through bad times ’till death do you part. Just like the show! This one is a keeper, you hold tight to that one. Likes the outdoors and has appreciation for the simple things in life.
Ideal Date Night – The traditional dinner and a movie.
Breaking Bad 
The typical tough on the outside but sensitive on the inside type of lover that will do what it takes to protect you. Beware, has a bad temper and may hurt a pizza in an angry outburst.
Ideal Date Night – Will make you a home cooked meal. Possibly Fried Chicken.
Caution: Very disturbing Image Below
Is the quiet observer at the party. You will be intrigued by this person’s dark and mysterious personality. Always lets emotion cloud their judgement and depending on his or her mood, can take things to an extreme. It’s either puppies and rainbows or hell on earth. Likes luxurious things but has a humble heart.
Ideal Date Night – Cocktails at a fancy lounge or sky bar.
Stranger Things
A Millennial in it’s truest form. Considers his tight group of friends like family and shares everything with them. This means it won’t be easy to be accepted in the group. Work your charm because they will judge you more than your in-laws. Enjoys house parties, fantasy/science fiction and Eggo waffles.
Ideal Date Night – A late night at the Arcade Hall.
House Of Cards
There is a slight chance this person is an evil, twisted, maniac sociopath. But hey it will sure as hell make the holidays exciting! Don’t expect to bond or share a personal connection, you will most likely have some sort of agreement as to how your situationship will work. A perfect Friend with Benefits, although they may not be your friend.
Ideal Date Night – A night at the Opera. The row you’re sitting in is completely empty because your date bought up all the tickets for you two to have some privacy. Bring an empty stomach ‘cuz the night ends in a random alley where you will share a rack of ribs ‘Lady and the tramp’ style.
Happy huntings.

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